After a late night out with G-Master, (yes, the infamous G-Master has returned for christmas break, and then it's back to Texas to finish out training) I had to get up for early church and play my t-bone. I like playing in church. It makes me sound twice as good as I really am. If you haven't ever played an instrument in church before, I highly recommend it. Singing really isn't the same, nor is playing the piano or organ. You need an instrument that fills the room and rings. Like the trombone, for example.....actually, though, a trumpet is better.......but don't let a trumpet player hear that. You know how they are.
I had a problem, though, playing in church today. I say, if I'm going to play, then it better be in a brass quartet or solo. Two trumpets, two trombones....or just one trombone. Anything else is too much. Especially when I have to play with woodwinds......ish......Today I had to play with 3 flutes, 1 clarinet, 2 french horns, 1 baritone, and 1 trombone + me. That is waaaay too many people. But that was only one of my issues. Out of all of those instruments, you'll notice a lack of trumpets.....what can I say, there are no good trumpet players in Lakeville. Prove me wrong...go ahead, I dare you. So the obvious leader of that ensemble was the trombones. But..........somehow, somebody thought that that wouldn't be too fair for the woodwinds and thought that the mighty trombones should surrender the melody, while the wimpy flutes try and hold the lead. Now that I have a problem with. There is no way a brass instrument of anykind should admit defeat and allow a woodwind to take our place. Especially in church where you mostly play fanfares. Brass instruments are the king of fanfares! Speaking of kings, what instrument always introduced a king? Trumpets. What are they made of? Brass! Imagine a big, powerful, imposing king being introduced by an oboe. I don't think so.
I know I probably sound prejudiced, or maybe somehow racist against woodwinds. Guess what. I am. I am all about segregation. Put the instruments in their places and keep them there. There is no room for crossing over and mixing. No sirrrrreeee. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to shave my head.